Removing Ex From My Mortgage

We tried the refinance route to remove my husband's previous wife from the mortgage- we want her off, she says she wants off, but is making it difficult and refuses to sign a quit claim deed. The bank stated that her signing a quit claim would make no difference and that because the home is a modular, it can only be refinanced at a 15 yr loan, which would double our payment and which we cannot afford to do, so we are stuck! There has to be/ should be some other option when both spouses, who are no longer married and who agree to which one should remain responsible for the loan, to make it simpler. Refinancing would lower our payment somewhat, but we are more interested in removing her from the loan, as she feels she is still entitled to come and go from the home, even though while married to my husband, she never payed anything toward the mortgage in 12 yrs, she just lived here. She no longer lives in the home, nor makes any monetary payment toward the home or its upkeep, but still feels it is her home, though I share it with my (her previous) husband. Is there some type of fraud involved when she no longer shares his last name? We contacted a lawyer, who basically said, if the bank doesn't want her name off the loan, they don't have to remove it. We also contacted other lenders, but they want an appraisal of the homes' current value, which would never equal the amount owed- it's in pretty bad shape and will take years to get it in good enough condition to be appraised at a fair value. We are truly stuck! How do we get her to sign a quit claim, just to get her out of our lives? I know it doesn't financially remove her, but it would give us some kind of peace of mind that she can no longer intrude into our lives and claim what is truly NOT hers!